Breaking Free from Dependence on Narcissists
"True freedom begins the moment you stop seeking validation from those who thrive on your self-doubt and start reclaiming the power that’s been yours all along."
Narcissists often thrive on creating chaos, making you question your worth and then leaving you to struggle while they play the hero for others. This can leave you feeling unsupported, unseen, and doubting your own instincts.
But here’s the truth: You don’t need their validation. You already have everything within you to rise.
Here’s how to start trusting yourself and depending on your inner strength:
1. Listen to Your Inner Voice
Research by Dr. Kristin Neff highlights the power of self-compassion. Start tuning into that quiet voice inside that tells you what’s right and wrong. Journalling or practicing mindfulness daily can help you reconnect with your intuition.
2. Set Boundaries
According to Dr. Ramani Durvasula (Should I Stay or Should I Go?), narcissists thrive when you have unclear boundaries. Clearly define what you will and won’t tolerate. Remember: boundaries are a form of self-respect.
3. Build Self-Reliance with Small Wins
Start small and prove to yourself that you can handle challenges independently. For example:
Solve a problem on your own, even if it takes extra time.
Reward yourself for every step you take without seeking outside approval.
4. Surround Yourself with Supportive People
While self-reliance is vital, having a community of people who genuinely care is equally important. Lean on spaces like SistaTalk to share, grow and get inspired by others’ journeys.
5. Educate Yourself About Narcissistic Tactics
The more you understand their behaviours (e.g., gaslighting, manipulation), the less you’ll internalise their actions. Dr. Ramani’s DAVRO model (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim-Offender) is a helpful tool for identifying when this is happening.
Healing takes time, but every step you take is a step toward freedom and strength. Learn to trust your decisions, celebrate your independence and know that your power lies within.
What steps have you taken to trust yourself more and move forward? Share your tips below to inspire someone else today!
