Madea’s Idiot’s Guide to Narcissists
Don’t Let ‘Em Play You, Baby
“Alright baby, let me break this down nice and simple, ‘cause these narcissists out here will have you thinking you the one that’s crazy. Uh-uh. Not today. Here’s the tea:”
See, a narcissist will walk in your life smiling like they bringing you blessings from heaven, when really they just brought chaos in a Gucci bag.
They will flip the script so many times you will be dizzy, wondering if you forgot the plot. That is their game. They get power not by being right, but by making you question yourself. Next thing you know, you apologisin’ for something they did!
Don’t let ‘em fool you, sugar. These folks ain’t got no cure, no fix-it kit and no “better version” waiting to come out if you just love them hard enough. Mm-mm. That’s like putting lipstick on a pig and wondering why it’s still rolling in mud.
The truth is, narcissists feed off your energy like it’s an all-you-can-eat buffet. They want control, they want attention and they want you running in circles like a hamster on Red Bull. But here’s the kicker, they will never, ever take responsibility. Nope. They’ll burn down the whole house and then hand you the matches like, “Look what you did!”
So baby, before you drive yourself to distraction, here’s Madea’s quick and dirty survival guide. Pay attention now:
They Always the Star of Their Own Show.
Narcissists think they the Beyoncé, the Michael Jackson and the Pope all rolled into one. If you don’t clap for them, they’ll guilt trip you like you ruined Christmas. Narcissists gotta feel special. Not regular special, like Beyoncé-level, 24/7 and to do it, they’ll suck the energy outta you like a mosquito at a picnic.
Control is Their Favourite Love Language.
They do not want peace, they want power. If they can keep you dancing to their tune, they winning. Don’t waste your breath trying to explain yourself, they already rewrote the script. They are going to fool you with all that “we can work this out” mess. Uh-uh! They don’t want solutions, sugar. They want control. It’s like arguing with the TV, it don’t talk back and you just look crazy.
Empathy? Baby, They Don’t Even Know Her.
You could be crying a river and they sitting there asking if you got a tissue ‘cause your tears are messing up their vibe. They don’t feel your pain, they just calculate how to use it against you.
Master Manipulators.
They slicker than butter on hot cornbread. They will lie, twist, spin and flip until you questioning your own shadow. Remember, just ‘cause they sound confident don’t mean they telling the truth.
The Victim Olympics.
Oh, Lord. They always the ones “done wrong.” You call them out? Suddenly you the bad guy. You point out the lie? Suddenly they “so hurt” you don’t trust them. Chile, please.
The Damage is Real.
Doctors say all this emotional rollercoaster can mess with your mental health, stress your body and even make you sick. And then what they do? Point their finger at you like, “See? You weak.”
Best Strategy? Don’t Play.
The number one way to “win” against a narcissist? Baby, don’t even enter the game. You cannot out-argue them, out-love them, or out-wait them. The only victory is peace, and that comes from stepping away.
Madea’s Bottom Line
“Listen here, stop tryna save somebody who ain’t even tryna save they own self. You can’t heal them with your love. You can’t fight crazy with logic.
What you can do is pack your joy, your sanity and your car keys and go build a life that ain’t run by somebody else’s drama. ‘Cause peace of mind, baby, that’s the real freedom.”
Like, comment and share this with someone who needs the reminder. You are not crazy, you’re just caught up with somebody who thrives on chaos. And once you see the game, you don’t have to play.
