Stop Waiting for Permission, Save Yourself
“If you’ve ever been told you’re ‘too intense,’ watch this.” - Bree Jenkins
When it comes to abuse or betrayal in relationships, there is no negotiation, no excuse, no “let me see if they’ll change.”
You do not need perfect timing, more motivation or a better reason to walk away.
Research in trauma psychology tells us that physical abuse and infidelity are two of the most damaging relational betrayals, not just emotionally, but neurologically. When you stay in a cycle of abuse or betrayal, your brain’s fight-or-flight system remains on high alert.
This triggers chronic stress, anxiety and a breakdown of your natural ability to trust, even in future healthy relationships. In fact, studies show that women who remain in abusive or toxic relationships are three times more likely to experience long-term mental health issues such as depression, PTSD and self-esteem erosion.
Cheating Is Not A Mistake. Abuse Is Not A bad day.
They are choices rooted in disrespect, manipulation and often a deep sense of entitlement on the part of the abuser.
As neuroscientist Dr. Caroline Leaf explains, “Toxic patterns change your brain’s wiring, making you doubt your reality and second-guess your worth.” When you wait for the “right time” or a moment of perfect courage, you are not preserving the relationship, you are eroding your own identity.
If you’re thinking, “Maybe I’m overreacting,” you’re not alone. That’s what abusers and betrayers count on, your doubt, your delay, your hesitancy to act.
But here’s the hard truth:
Waiting doesn’t make it better.
Forgiving the unforgivable doesn’t make you stronger.
Hoping they’ll change won’t heal the damage they caused.
Statistics from Women’s Aid and The National Domestic Violence Hotline are sobering:
1 in 3 women have experienced some form of physical or sexual violence by an intimate partner.
Cheating is one of the top three causes of divorce and relationship breakdown worldwide.
In abusive relationships, abuse escalates over time, it rarely stops without intervention or the victim leaving.
Take Control Without Delay
When betrayal or abuse shows up in your life, hesitation is the enemy of your healing. You don’t need more signs, second chances or silent suffering. The choice to protect your peace is yours and it's one you make without apology, without waiting for approval.
Here’s your call to act with courage, clarity and conviction:
Stop waiting for someone to give you permission to protect your peace.
Stop waiting for them to have a change of heart.
Stop waiting for a perfect plan.
Walk away because YOU decide your worth.
Walk away because your life and legacy are bigger than their betrayal.
Walk away because you’re not just saving yourself , you’re setting a standard for every woman watching you choose freedom over fear.
Relationship Reflection
Every relationship, whether romantic, professional or personal, thrives on healthy boundaries. Yet too often, we ignore our inner voice because we fear rocking the boat, being judged or losing someone we care about. The truth is, boundaries aren’t about pushing people away, they’re about protecting your peace, your dignity and your future.
When you withhold boundaries, you invite patterns that chip away at your confidence and self-worth.
Before you look for external validation or wait for the "right moment," ask yourself honestly:
What boundary have you been afraid to enforce?
What permission are you waiting for that you already have the power to give yourself?
The Love You Want Begins With The Self-Respect You Demand
The love you want, the kind that nourishes, respects and values you, begins with the self-respect you refuse to compromise. It's not built on empty apologies, false promises or temporary changes. It's built on the unshakable belief that you are worthy of love that uplifts, not love that drains.
While the world may tell you to wait, to forgive again, to give them just one more chance, the truth is, you don’t need perfect conditions, more courage or the approval of anyone else to make a change. You only need one powerful moment of fierce decision, a moment when you choose yourself, without guilt and without delay.
No one is coming to save you. But you?
You’ve been the hero of your story all along. The moment you stop waiting is the moment you start living, fully, freely and without apology. Know this, the real rescue mission isn’t about being saved, it’s about reclaiming your worth, your peace and your power to walk away from anything that diminishes you.
If this spoke to something deep inside of you, take a moment to share your thoughts or your first brave step forward. Your voice could be the light someone else needs today. If you’ve found strength in these words, share this with someone who might need the reminder, that they are stronger than they know and their freedom starts with a single decision.
If you believe this truth matters, don’t hesitate to show your support. Your engagement isn’t just a click, it’s a stand for every woman fighting to reclaim her life.
Picture Source: Junior Reis
