Our Culture Has Had Little to Say About Menopause, Let’s Change That
For decades, menopause has been framed as an ending, a biological shutdown, a loss of youth or worse, a punchline. Our culture has had little to say about it beyond whispers and warnings.
But what if we imagined menopause differently? What if it marked the beginning of a new chapter, one that liberates us from biological and societal expectations and invites us to redefine ourselves on our own terms?
Menopause is not just a medical milestone. It is a deeply personal transformation, physical, emotional and cultural. For many women, hot flushes are one of the most visible and disruptive symptoms. But what happens after menopause? Do they ever stop and is the experience the same for everyone?
Hot Flushes. More Than Just a Symptom
In a culture that often reduces menopause to a punchline or a private inconvenience, hot flushes have become the most visible and most misunderstood symptom. They are portrayed in sitcoms as comedic outbursts or dismissed as something women should simply “get through.” But the reality is far more complex.
According to the National Institute on Aging, hot flushes tend to gradually subside over time, even without treatment. Yet for many women, they can persist for 7–10 years or longer after their last period. In rare cases, they continue into the 70s.
The Mayo Clinic reports that up to 75% of menopausal women experience hot flushes, with about 25% experiencing them severely enough to impact daily life.
These are not just physical episodes, they are moments of vulnerability, disruption and often embarrassment. So when society offers little understanding or support, they become isolating.
Thankfully, treatment options are evolving. Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT) remains the most effective for many, but newer non-hormonal medications like Fezolinetant (Veozah) are offering alternatives. Lifestyle changes, cooling strategies, stress management and mind-body therapies like hypnotherapy and mindfulness are also helping women reclaim control.
But here is the cultural shift we need. Stop treating hot flushes as a joke or a nuisance and start recognising them as part of a powerful transition, one that deserves empathy, visibility and respect.
A Different Journey
Menopause is universal, but It is not uniform. For Black women and other women of colour, the journey can be earlier, longer and more intense than what is typically portrayed.
The SWAN Study (Study of Women’s Health Across the Nation), a landmark longitudinal study, reveals that:
Black women reach menopause at 49, nearly two years earlier than white women.
Hispanic/Latina women also reach menopause earlier and report more vaginal dryness.
Hot flushes last longer: White women ~6.5 years. Hispanic/Latina women ~8.9 years and Black women ~10 years
Why the difference?
Researchers point to chronic stress, systemic racism and socioeconomic factors that contribute to a higher “allostatic load,” the wear and tear on the body from long-term stress. This can disrupt hormones and accelerate menopause onset.
Additionally, Black women are 26% less likely to be prescribed hormone therapy and often receive less support for managing symptoms.
What Women Feel as Loss
Culture is not destiny. Around kitchen tables, in WhatsApp groups, in church halls and book clubs, women are beginning to reclaim the narrative.
Menopause can be a time of power and reinvention. A chance to shed roles that no longer fit. To rediscover passions, to speak with a voice sharpened by experience. It can be art shows started at fifty-five, new businesses launched at sixty, friendships forged in shared understanding.
Your experience, whether your hot flushes have ended, linger or returned, is part of this larger cultural awakening. By refusing silence, we challenge the myths that have kept generations of women isolated and unseen.
Let’s talk about menopause as the transformation it truly is. A celebration of endurance and renewal, especially for Black women and women of colour whose stories have too often been overlooked. When we change the conversation, we change the culture and when we change the culture, we change lives.
Let’s face it, menopause is not just about physical symptoms. It is also a time of emotional reckoning. Yes, many women report a sense of loss, not just of fertility, but of identity, vitality and emotional stability.
Sadly here are five common feelings of loss:
Loss of Identity: Shifting roles in family, career and society can lead to a sense of “Who am I now?”
Loss of Fertility: Even if children were never part of the plan, the finality of reproductive years can evoke grief.
Loss of Physical Vitality: Fatigue, weight gain and changes in appearance can impact self-esteem.
Loss of Cognitive Clarity: “Brain fog” and forgetfulness are common and frustrating.
Loss of Emotional Stability: Mood swings, anxiety and lowered libido can feel like emotional upheaval.
But these losses can also be reframed as transitions, opportunities to rediscover passions, redefine purpose and reclaim joy.
No One-Size-Fits-All
“There is no one-size-fits-all diagnosis for perimenopause.” That’s true, and it is part of the challenge. Symptoms can be vague, overlapping with stress, thyroid issues or mental health conditions. Many women are misdiagnosed or dismissed.
But the good news is, you can be proactive. Track your symptoms, speak up with your doctor and find a community of women in your same phase. In other words
"Build the roadmap together and see where that takes you."
For some, that might mean HRT. For others, it could be journalling, yoga or rediscovering creativity.
Your Experience Deserves to Be Seen
Whether your hot flushes have stopped, are still lingering or have returned unexpectedly, you are not alone. Every woman’s journey through menopause is different and that is not just okay, It is powerful.
But here is the truth. We have been conditioned to experience menopause in silence. To treat it as a private inconvenience, a medical footnote or a sign of decline. Our culture has had little to say about menopause and when it does, it often speaks in euphemisms, jokes or dismissals.
This silence has consequences. It shapes how we see ourselves, how we seek care and how society responds to our needs. It is why so many women feel isolated, misdiagnosed or invisible during one of the most transformative phases of their lives.
But menopause is not the end. It is a beginning. A chance to rewrite your story, reclaim your health and reconnect with your power. It is a time to ask new questions, explore new passions and challenge outdated narratives.
Most importantly, It is a time to speak up!
Let’s stop whispering about menopause. Let’s start talking, loudly, proudly and together.
And that's not all.
Let’s build communities where women of all backgrounds, especially Black women and women of colour, whose experiences are often overlooked, can share their truths, access informed care and be celebrated for their resilience.
You have to admit, when we change the conversation, we change the culture. When we change the culture, we change lives.
If this post resonated with you, do not keep it to yourself.
Like it to show support, comment to share your own experience or perspective and share it with someone who needs to know they are not alone.
The more we talk about menopause openly, honestly and across cultures, the more we shift the narrative from silence to strength. Let’s keep the conversation going.
