There is a moment in every unhealthy relationship when the story stops being about two people and quietly becomes a crowd.
This is what psychologists call flying monkeys. Individuals who defend, enable or deliver messages on behalf of someone causing harm. What makes this dynamic so confusing is that it rarely begins with hostility.
Narcissism is not one behaviour. It is a spectrum. It is a strategy. It is sometimes a weapon.
The most dangerous narcissists do not announce themselves, they disguise themselves. They present as charming, vulnerable, victimised or visionary, but the goal is often the same, control that masquerades as connection.
In leadership, love, family and business, these personalities show up with different tactics but identical impact. Understanding these patterns is not just survival. It is strategy.
Empaths are wired to feel. Narcissists are wired to be felt.
This imbalance is not accidental, it is the exact magnetic dynamic that often draws empaths into toxic relationships with narcissists. One seeks to heal, understand and love deeply. The other seeks validation, control and power, often at any cost.
Empaths are often deep feelers, peacekeepers, natural listeners, over thinkers, emotional or sponges. These traits, when unguarded, become weapons in the hands of someone who knows how to manipulate kindness into compliance.
The narcissist is not in love with you, they are in love with the game.
A performance.
A transaction.
A trick.
Welcome, friends. Today, we are not baking bread or crafting seasonal décor. Instead, we are stepping into the darkly fascinating kitchen of human behaviour to whip up one of the most destructive recipes of all, the Narcissist. While the ingredients may look tempting on the shelf, the finished product is always bitter, hollow and ultimately harmful.
2 Cups Inflated Ego
At first glance, the female narcissist rarely looks like the villain. In fact, she often looks like the hero of her own glamorous story. Confident, magnetic and seemingly irresistible.
But beneath the surface is a pattern of behaviour that quietly corrodes relationships, leaving her partners questioning their sanity and their worth. Understanding these signs is not just about spotting red flags, it is about reclaiming your own perspective.
The truth about female narcissists is that they rarely appear dangerous at first. They move through the world with charm, allure and an almost magnetic confidence that draws people in. Unlike the caricature of arrogance, we often associate with narcissism, the female narcissist cloaks her toxicity in seduction, vulnerability or even playfulness, making her far harder to recognise.
They do something hurtful, deny it, then accuse you of “being crazy.” Gaslighting is a highly deceptive form of manipulation where the abuser commits hurtful actions, then flatly denies them, even asserting that you are “imagining things” or “overreacting.” Over time, this tactic chips away at your confidence, making you doubt your own memories, emotions and sense of reality. Victims often feel confused, anxious or like they’re going crazy.
“Alright baby, let me break this down nice and simple, ‘cause these narcissists out here will have you thinking you the one that’s crazy. Uh-uh. Not today. Here’s the tea:”
See, a narcissist will walk in your life smiling like they bringing you blessings from heaven, when really, they just brought chaos in a Gucci bag. They will flip the script so many times you will be dizzy, wondering if you forgot the plot. That is their game. They get power not by being right, but by making you question yourself. Next thing you know, you apologisin’ for something they did!
Do not let ‘em fool you, sugar. These folks ain’t got no cure, no fix-it kit and no “better version” waiting to come out if you just love them hard enough. Mm-mm. That’s like putting lipstick on a pig and wondering why it is still rolling…
Never forget narcissists are emotionally and cognitively “trapped in the mind of a two‑year‑old,” unable to truly reason, negotiate, cooperate, love or empathize. Instead, their world is built on ultimatums, demands, greed, egocentrism, bullying, temper tantrums, silent treatments and a constant refrain of “I WANT” and “GIVE ME.”
This blunt, almost jarring comparison to a toddler helps illustrate the immaturity and emotional volatility you might experience when interacting with a narcissist. It's not that they’re children in age, but they often react with the simplicity and self‑centeredness of one, flipping into aggression or withdrawal the moment their needs or desires aren’t met.
If you've found yourself on the receiving end of tantrums, relentless demands or manipulative silence, know that these behaviours are no accident, they’re emotional tactics. By likening them to a young child’s limited emotional development, this message highlights the core issue, a narcissist’s inability…
Let’s be clear, narcissists don’t always come with warning labels. In fact, in public, they often shine like stars. Overly agreeable, always the “perfect” partner, the life of the party, charming, witty and oh-so-lovable.
But behind closed doors? That charm curdles fast.
Over-agreeing to win you over
So your ex had the audacity, the nerve and the lack of sense to text you,
“Baby I’m in jail.”
And now they want you to save them like you’re a whole SWAT team and a public defender in one. Well baby, in the words of Madea…….
“I don’t do jail. I do Jesus… and even He got boundaries!”
"You have been criticising yourself for years and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens." – Louise Hay
Far too many of us spend our energy chasing the bare minimum in relationships—romantic, familial or platonic. We shrink, second-guess our worth and find ourselves begging for time, affection or presence. But these are not signs of love—they are echoes of unhealed wounds. And though this pattern may not be your fault, it is now your responsibility to begin healing.
From a neuroscience perspective, our experiences of abandonment or emotional neglect deeply shape how our brain interprets safety and love. The amygdala, our emotional alarm system, becomes overactive when we perceive rejection. Over time, we begin to equate worth with struggle. But Louise Hay taught us a radical truth: we can rewire these beliefs…
Whew chile! Now you KNOW this one’s gonna ruffle a few feathers and stir a few chuckles too…
Imagine this: You’re minding your peaceful, unbothered business, glowing, growing, sipping your herbal tea and outta nowhere, a message pops up from your ex. And not just any message… but one of those messages: “Hey, I got someone better than you.”
Now see… in the past, that might’ve sent you spiralling. But not today, boo. Today, you're evolved. You're healed(ish). You're grounded in peace… or at least petty with purpose.
This post isn’t about revenge. It’s about reclaiming your power. Laughing through what used to hurt and remembering that closure doesn't come from them, it comes from within. But sometimes, it also comes in a sharp, three-word clapback that leaves no room for replies.
“Now, baby, I love you, but we ain’t doin’ no cryin’ over somebody who got the emotional intelligence of a toaster oven. Uh-uh! No ma’am! Wipe them tears and listen up.”
First of all, you won. You hear me? You WON! This fool thought they was playing chess while you was just living life and now they sittin’ there confused ‘cause you packed up your self-respect and walked smooth out that game. That’s what I call a mic drop moment!
Proud Sista!
Proud Sista!
Proud Sista!
Proud Sista!
Proud Sista!
