Menopause and Intimacy

Sonia Brown MBE
7 minutes ago
3 min read

The Untold Story Behind the Research

When we think about menopause, conversations often circle around hot flushes, mood swings and HRT. But intimacy? That is the silent partner in this transition, rarely discussed, yet deeply felt. Add a global pandemic into the mix and the silence becomes deafening. So, what does the evidence really say about how perimenopause and menopause shape sexual relationships and how did COVID-19 change the game?

The Global Reality

International research paints a clear picture. Hormonal changes during perimenopause and menopause often lead to lower sexual desire, vaginal dryness and painful intercourse. These are not isolated experiences, they are common and they matter.

While hormone therapy offers some relief, its impact on sexual function is modest at best.

Then came COVID-19. Lockdowns disrupted routines, heightened stress and amplified intimacy challenges. Global studies show sexual function scores dropped significantly, with declines in desire, arousal and satisfaction. Interestingly, solo sex increased while partnered intimacy often decreased, a shift that speaks volumes about coping mechanisms during isolation.

The UK Perspective

Closer to home, the UK’s Natsal surveys remind us that many women remain sexually active well into later life, but frequency naturally declines with age and health.

Lockdown added another layer of complexity> Mental health deterioration and isolation worsened sexual wellbeing. Some couples adapted and even grew closer, but others faced intimacy struggles that were hard to navigate.

For ethnic minority women, cultural stigma and lack of tailored support created additional barriers, making help-seeking even less likely during a time when services were stretched thin.

Caribbean & Afro-Caribbean Context

In the Caribbean, the story is even more nuanced. Afro-Caribbean women often experience earlier menopause, more severe symptoms and longer transitions. Pandemic isolation likely deepened existing challenges, stigma, silence and limited access to culturally sensitive care.

These factors do not just affect physical health, they shape emotional wellbeing and relationship dynamics in profound ways.

What Academics Are Saying

Leading scholars are clear. Menopause is not just a biological event, it is a social and cultural experience. The call is for a shift from purely medical fixes to holistic, culturally aware approaches. Frameworks like interpretivist and Afrocentric models emphasise understanding menopause in context, identity, culture and lived experience, not just hormones.

This is where the future of research and care is heading.

Practical Strategies for Rebuilding Intimacy

Research is important, but what can you do today? Here are evidence-informed strategies for professionals navigating intimacy during menopause and beyond:

Start with Communication: Open dialogue with your partner is the cornerstone. Share what you’re experiencing, physical changes, emotional shifts and what feels good or doesn’t. Silence breeds misunderstanding, conversation builds connection.

Prioritise Emotional Closeness: Lockdown taught us that intimacy isn’t just physical. Schedule time for shared activities, walks, cooking together, or even mindfulness exercises. Emotional bonding often reignites physical desire.

Explore Non-Hormonal Solutions: Lubricants, vaginal moisturisers and pelvic floor exercises can make a significant difference. These are simple, accessible tools that improve comfort and confidence.

Seek Professional Support: Do not hesitate to consult a menopause specialist or sexual health therapist. Virtual consultations are now widely available, making expert advice easier to access than ever.

Reframe Intimacy: Menopause can be an opportunity to redefine intimacy. Focus on pleasure, not performance. Experiment with touch, massage and sensual activities that foster connection without pressure.

Manage Stress Proactively: Stress is a libido killer. Incorporate stress-reduction practices, yoga, journaling, or even short breathing exercises, into your routine. Your mental wellbeing is directly linked to sexual health.

Why This Matters

Menopause isn’t just a biological event, it is a social and cultural experience. Talking openly about intimacy, even in times of crisis, can help break stigma and improve quality of life.

Sexual changes during menopause are common, but they are not inevitable. COVID-19 amplified stress and intimacy challenges, especially for minority women. Hormone therapy helps, but psychosocial support and open dialogue matter just as much.

Researchers are calling for intersectional, culturally sensitive care and education, and That is a conversation we need to lead.