What Women Feel

Sonia Brown MBE
Apr 16
13 min read

Updated: May 13

What Women Felt About Leading with Confidence: Empowering Women in the Workplace

In today’s world, where the dynamics of leadership are evolving rapidly, one thing remains constant: the struggle for women to truly step into their power. In the words of co-host Gina Worthy (US) the Across the Pond: Leading with Confidence webinar resonated deeply with many of those in attendance. It revealed something profound.

“As women, we often fight battles of invisibility, self-doubt and unconscious bias, all while trying to lead and succeed in spaces where we’re frequently overlooked or underestimated.”

We asked attendees what was one of the biggest challenges they faced in the work place and the word cloud from the webinar said it all. Lack of Visibility, credibility, self-doubt and unconscious bias. These aren’t just buzzwords, they are real, lived experiences that so many women navigate daily in the workplace. And yet, despite these roadblocks, the message is clear, we are not powerless!

Based on the feedback and the word cloud, let’s break down how women can lead with confidence, passion and create the perfect opportunity to walk in their personal power and purpose.

1. Own Your Visibility: Show Up Boldly

One of the most profound challenges in leadership for women is the battle for visibility. As Gina shared, many women still find themselves pouring out their energy, showing up day after day and yet remaining unseen. The solution? Own your visibility!

It's crucial to understand that visibility goes beyond just being physically present in a room, it’s about ensuring your presence, contributions and ideas are recognised and valued. Unfortunately, for Black women (and of colour), this process is often hindered by systemic biases tied to their appearance, cultural identity and stereotypes. These barriers affect how they are perceived in the workplace, impacting their professional visibility and progression.

“The journey to visibility isn’t just an individual challenge it’s shaped by deep cultural socialisation and generational legacies.“

From a young age, Black women are often socialised to understand that their natural hair, skin tone and cultural expressions might not be accepted or celebrated in mainstream society. This reality creates a tension when entering professional spaces where Eurocentric beauty standards and norms often dominate. This cultural dissonance can make it harder for Black women to own their visibility confidently, as they navigate the demands of conforming versus the desire to embrace their authentic selves.

Further complicating this is the generational perspective. Older generations of Black women often had to assimilate into white-dominated corporate cultures, sometimes sacrificing their cultural identity (such as their natural hairstyles or African-inspired clothing) for the sake of advancement. In contrast, younger generations, empowered by social movements like Black Lives Matter and the rise of self-love and self-acceptance, feel more empowered to push back against these restrictive standards and own their cultural identity.

However, the differences in approach between generations can lead to intergenerational tensions, as younger women might feel pressure to prove themselves even more fiercely, knowing they are challenging the status quo.

Let’s Not Forget About The Great Hair Debate

Research from McKinsey highlights that Black women face distinct challenges in the workplace due to biases related to their hair and appearance. The 2020 McKinsey & Company report, "The Diversity and Inclusion Revolution: Eight Powerful Truths," touches on how Black women’s professional progression is influenced by the expectations placed on their appearance.

The report discusses how Black women’s natural hairstyles including afros, braids and dreadlocks are often seen as unprofessional or disruptive to the "standard" professional image, which tends to favour Eurocentric beauty standards. The research also suggests that when Black women deviate from these standards, they face heightened levels of scrutiny and judgment, which directly impacts their opportunities for advancement and visibility within corporate environments.

Neuroscience offers further insight into why these biases are so deeply ingrained. The brain’s neural pathways are wired to respond to familiar patterns, often favouring what it deems "normative." Cognitive biases, such as confirmation bias and in-group bias, come into play when decision-makers, whether consciously or unconsciously, favour individuals who conform to their personal or cultural expectations often based on appearance.

For Black women, this creates an additional layer of difficulty, as their physical features, such as hair texture, can lead to being perceived as "other" or less professional by their colleagues, regardless of their qualifications or contributions.

The perception of Black women's hair and appearance can trigger cognitive dissonance, where their natural selves conflict with the dominant social norms in the workplace. This tension affects their professional relationships and visibility.

Dawn Butler MP made history as the first Black woman to wear her hair in natural locks in the Houses of Parliament. This act sparked both admiration and overdue conversation about identity, representation and the subtle biases still present within British political institutions.

This is important because women who are penalised for their natural hairstyles or appearance often experience stress and self-doubt, which, according to neuroscience, can lead to decreased cognitive performance and lower self-esteem. This directly impacts their ability to advocate for themselves and claim their space.

But We Will Not Silenced

Black scholars have long documented how appearance-related biases disproportionately affect the careers of Black women (and of colour). Dr. Tanya Williams, a scholar of Black women’s experiences in the workplace, explores how hair discrimination is a barrier to Black women's professional success. In her research, Williams highlights the ways in which professional standards of grooming often exclude Black cultural aesthetics, leading to negative impacts on career progression.

Further, a study by Dr. Stacey M. Floyd-Thomas also reveals how Black women are forced to navigate a double bind where they are penalised for embracing their authentic cultural identity (through their hair, clothing or speech) while simultaneously pressured to assimilate into mainstream standards that do not reflect their true selves. This ongoing tension contributes to invisibility and disempowerment, as Black women are often told their natural expressions of identity are not professional or acceptable.

To overcome this challenge, Black women must own their visibility in a way that allows them to embrace their full, authentic selves while strategically navigating the workplace. It starts with resilience choosing to embrace and express who they are, knowing that their presence matters and that their unique qualities bring value to the workplace. This requires a fundamental shift in both how Black women view their worth and how organisations must change to fully recognise and support them.

Building on this, organisations should consider implementing bias training, re-evaluating dress codes and encouraging inclusive beauty standards to ensure all employees, regardless of their race or cultural background, feel valued and seen. Additionally, workplaces must actively work to create safe spaces where Black women can confidently show up, without fear of judgment or exclusion and own their space.

*"When we show up boldly, we claim our space" Gina Worthey*

Black women deserve to be seen and heard in the workplace just as they are.

By owning your visibility, embracing your identity and contributing boldly to the conversation, Black women can shatter barriers to their progression. Leaders, colleagues and decision-makers need to recognise the value in authenticity, support diversity and empower all women to walk confidently into their personal power and purpose.

Let’s support each other in this journey, pushing for an environment where we are not just seen but celebrated for who we truly are.

2. Reframing Self-Doubt: The Power of Your Inner Voice

Your self-talk is one of the most powerful tools you have. The question is “What are you saying to yourself each day?”

If your thoughts are clouded with negativity, uncertainty and self-criticism, you’ll feel stuck. But when you reframe your thoughts, focusing on your strengths, progress and vision, your sense of confidence will naturally grow.

One of the key elements of confidence is communication. How do you speak to yourself and others? Clarity comes when your inner narrative is aligned with your authentic purpose and compelling confidence arises when you act in alignment with that clarity.

Neuroscience shows that when you repeat positive affirmations or focus on positive self-talk, your brain releases dopamine, the chemical responsible for motivation and reward. Repeatedly using affirmations or visualising your success doesn’t just feel good in the moment; it rewires the brain for growth and empowerment rather than being led by fear, doubt or negativity.

"What the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve." Napoleon Hill

The neuroplasticity of the brain means that thought patterns are not fixed, they can change. According to Dr. Tara Brach, a clinical psychologist and mindfulness expert believes,

“When we practice mindfulness and reframe our inner dialogue, we rewire the brain to process information more optimistically.” Dr Tara

Brach suggests that when we give space to negative emotions such as self-doubt, we can process them healthily instead of letting them hijack our progress. Self-doubt is not something you can eliminate overnight, but it’s something you can learn to reframe and respond to with compassion and strength.

Furthermore, research by Dr. Claude Steele on stereotype threat, shows that Black women in particular, often experience additional layers of self-doubt due to the intersection of race and gender bias. When we constantly face scrutiny and judgment, we internalise the message that we aren’t enough. To overcome this, we must shift the narrative, recognising that success is not luck, but the result of a clear vision and commitment in the face of adversity.

"Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person you become." Dennis Kimbro, Think and Grow Rich: A Black Choice

Ladies, we need to know that confidence does not mean knowing all the answers, but rather trusting that you have the ability to figure things out as you go. In order to silence the inner critic, you must have a clear vision of your goals. A vision that’s aligned with your authentic self and not with what others expect of you. Many women, especially Black women, are often caught in cycles of imposed goals that don’t resonate with their true values or dreams. These goals, shaped by societal pressures, restrict growth and keep you stuck.

Research on goal-setting by scholars like Dr. Beverly Daniel Tatum, highlight how Black women are often taught to adapt to societal expectations, which can lead to frustration and lack of fulfillment in leadership roles. Tatum explains that the psychological toll of always trying to conform can create a deep-seated sense of self-doubt, as women feel pressured to meet external goals at the expense of their personal aspirations.

Clarity only comes when you define what truly matters to you, commit to it and then act decisively towards that vision. For Black women, this means creating spaces of belonging where you don’t have to silence your authentic self to be successful. When you own your narrative, you break free from the constraints of societal expectations and you move toward a vision that’s not just about career success, but about fulfilling your purpose in a way that feels meaningful.

Once you’ve defined your vision, the next step is commitment. Self-doubt thrives in indecision and when you are unsure of your path, it’s easier for the inner critic to take charge. The key to silencing self-doubt is to decide what you want your reality to look like and stay committed to that vision, despite external pressures.

And not only that, Dr. Angela Davis, has emphasied the importance of commitment to a cause, noting that when we commit to our vision, whether it’s in social justice or professional growth, we actively create the reality we want. Davis points out that true leaders are those who are rooted in their values and their commitment serves as a beacon that others follow. When you define your reality and commit to it, you push past the barriers of self-doubt, paving the way for your personal power to rise.

Ladies, success isn’t a matter of luck, it’s about clarity, commitment and the ability to persevere in the face of adversity. Many women on the webinar found it difficult to challenge in uncomfortable situations. However, according to neuroscientific studies, overcoming setbacks and challenges actually strengthens the brain’s resilience. When you persist despite difficulties, your brain adapts, growing stronger, more focused and better equipped to handle future challenges. This phenomenon, known as post-traumatic growth, proves that struggles, including self-doubt, are opportunities for growth, not barriers.

The good thing is that it’s not all doom and gloom.

Conquering self-doubt requires more than just fighting negative thoughts. It requires clarity in your vision, commitment to your authentic goals and the confidence to trust your journey despite external obstacles. Self-doubt is natural, but it does not define your potential. With the right mindset and a clear sense of direction, you can turn doubt into strength and confidence into an unstoppable force.

Remember, success is not luck, but a product of a clear vision, commitment and action. When you push past self-doubt and embrace your authentic self, you become not only the leader you’ve always wanted to be, but the leader that others need to see.

3. Lead with Passion and Purpose: Create Opportunities for Yourself

“Confidence is about standing in your truth. When you lead with passion and purpose, that truth will resonate with those around you. You’ll create the perfect opportunities to walk in your personal power and lead with the authenticity and clarity that women in leadership need.” Gina Worthey

Leading with passion and purpose is not just about what you do, it’s about aligning your work with your values, vision and the deep, authentic purpose that drives you. It’s about crafting a career and a leadership style that excites you, challenges you and allows you to bring your whole self to the table.

When you lead with passion, you not only create opportunities for yourself but you also set a standard for others to follow. You naturally build momentum, connections and a network of support (allys) that elevates your impact, creating a ripple effect that can influence and inspire those around you.

As Gina mentioned, confidence is not about pretending to have it all together, it’s about standing in your truth. When you lead with purpose, you connect deeply with who you are and that authenticity resonates with those around you. People are drawn to truth, passion and clarity. Your enthusiasm will inspire others to find their own voice, creating opportunities for collective growth.

But what is it that holds women back from leading with passion and purpose?

Often, it’s the weight of imposter syndrome. The fear of being judged or rejected because they feel they don’t belong, or because their journey is not aligned with what is traditionally accepted. Yet, the truth is, passion creates opportunities. The fear of stepping forward can only be overcome by action.

By owning your uniqueness and choosing to take a step toward your purpose, no matter the resistance. Leading with purpose means embracing the things that excite and challenge you, rather than trying to fit into a mould that doesn’t reflect your authenticity.

It is important to remember that leading with passion is more than just a mental state, it’s a physiological process that can drive behavioural change and influence others. Research by Dr. Antonio Damasio, a neuroscientist at the University of Southern California, highlights that our emotions play a critical role in decision-making. When we act with passion, the brain releases dopamine, the neurotransmitter responsible for motivation and pleasure. This creates a cycle where positive emotion fuels positive action and action further fuels confidence.

When you lead with purpose, you engage the prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain responsible for decision-making, problem-solving and goal-setting. When aligned with your true values, the brain's neural pathways are reinforced, helping you stay focused on the long-term vision and build a sense of self-efficacy. This process makes you feel more confident and capable, enabling you to act with clarity and purpose in the face of challenges.

Let’s keep it real, studies consistently show that purpose-driven leadership isn’t just good for your soul, it’s good for business too. A Harvard Business Review article by Monica Worline and Jane Dutton (2017) asserts that passionate leadership increases engagement, boosts employee productivity and promotes innovation. They emphasise that leaders who operate with purpose, create cultures of trust and collaboration, attracting others who are aligned with the mission. This creates opportunities for collective growth and fosters a supportive environment that elevates everyone's impact.

Moreover, Dr. Dennis Kimbro, author of The Wealth Choice, speaks directly to the power of purpose when he says, “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person you become.” Kimbro’s words remind us that passion and purpose don’t just help us lead ourselves, they attract those around us who are also driven by similar values. When you lead with clarity and conviction, you naturally inspire others to follow and help build a path to success. Passion is contagious. The energy you put out into the world draws like-minded individuals who can support your growth and elevate your leadership.

So ladies, when you lead with passion and purpose, you create the space to walk in your personal power. This means standing confidently in your authenticity, without needing to fit into a preconceived box of what leadership should look like. As you stand in your truth, you attract opportunities and networks that align with your goals and values. You move through the world not just as a leader, but as a changemaker, inspiring others to step into their own purpose.

Dr. Maya Angelou encapsulates this beautifully:

"We all should know that diversity makes for a rich tapestry and we must understand that all the threads of the tapestry are equal in value no matter their colour."

Angelou’s words speak to the importance of diversity of thought and experience. When you lead with passion, you’re not only creating opportunities for yourself but contributing to a broader, more inclusive landscape for everyone. Your leadership, rooted in authenticity and clarity, can transform organisations and communities.

Let’s not forget that this cloud image perfectly captures the essence of leading with passion and purpose. It reflects the power of authenticity and clarity in the workplace; where women show up as their full selves, taking charge of their careers and defining their leadership journey on their terms. The visual reinforces the notion that true leadership comes from within and by standing in your truth, you create opportunities not just for yourself, but for those who come after you.

As you embark on your leadership journey, remember, confidence isn’t about perfection, it’s about embracing your uniqueness and leading with purpose. When you do this, you’ll create a ripple effect of inspiration, growth and opportunity that empowers those around you.

Step Into Your Power: Take Action Today

As you embark on your leadership journey, remember: confidence isn’t about perfection it’s about embracing your uniqueness and leading with purpose. When you do this, you’ll create a ripple effect of inspiration, growth, and opportunity that empowers those around you.

Take charge of your career, align your goals with your values and lead with clarity and passion. Let your enthusiasm for what you do shine through and watch how it draws others into your orbit, helping you build the support and momentum needed to achieve your vision.

Now is the time to act. The world needs your leadership.

Don’t miss the next Across the Pond: Leading with Confidence session! Prioritising Wellness for Professional Women: Check up from the Neck Up will take place on Tuesday, 20th May 2025, from 7:00pm – 8:30pm (UK) | Reserve your place today.

This isn’t another pep talk about balance. It’s a deep dive into the psychological wiring, social conditioning and cultural norms that have taught professional women to sideline their own wellness.

Because burnout isn’t a badge of honour, it’s a signal. Don’t wait, reserve your space today and continue your journey of growth and empowerment.

Let’s keep this conversation going which word from the cloud stood out the most for you? Is it visibility, self-doubt or something else? Like, comment and share this post to continue the dialogue, empower other women and build a community of confident leaders who refuse to be silenced. We are not the problem. We are the leaders the world needs.

Shout out to my amazing co-host, Gina and our inspiring guest, Dr. Doirean Wilson BEM.

Let’s rise, support one another and lead the way!